Not a Victim Blog #4
“Keeping our eyes on Jesus, the source and perfecter of our faith, who for the joy that lay before Him endured a cross and despised the shame and has sat down at the right hand of God’s throne.”
Hebrews 12:2 HCSB
https://bible.com/bible/72/heb.12.2.HCSB
As I wait at the airport I overhear a conversation between three women. They could very well be talking about the person I’ve been referring to in this blog. Their situation was different but the dialogue was the same.
Sitting on the receiving end what I hear seems to be so petty and annoying. However, I’ve been on their side too many times and I understand their pain.
Sometimes I find myself complaining to others about the injustice, the frustration and the mere anger and hurt of it all. But then I realize my audience is over it, and they’ve heard enough. I also hear myself and how petty it all sounds. Also, venting to to our loved ones and friends puts negative thoughts in their mind about the narcissist of this world. But what do we do? It is petty stuff, but it’s real and it’s enough! The hurt is real. The relationship breakdown is real. The mistrust is real. Health professionals say not to bottle these feelings up.
What do we do?
Personally, I go to writing. Journals. Blogging. And maybe a book. Not everyone likes to write. This is a personal outlet that has helped me tremendously. I also found that writing to the narcissist rather than talking helps in many ways.
When talking to the narcissist, the conversation goes every which way and throws me off track. By writing I can focus, get my thoughts together and respond with purpose, bringing things back on track.
Writing also keeps a record of the facts. It’s proof when the narcissist tries to lie and cover up. In fact I’ve found out that writing is not a popular avenue of communication with narcissists. Anything that keeps a record of our conversation is key.
We don’t need to be a victim! We can grow stronger through this and learn to give compassion to others with similar situations. But we can’t do anything without the filling of the Holy Spirit.
I said writing was my outlet, and it is. What I didn’t say is that prayer is my protection and safety net. We can tell God anything and everything! He already knows and wants us to confide in Him! He wants to give us what we need, so we are not a victim!
“But He said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for power is perfected in weakness.” Therefore, I will most gladly boast all the more about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may reside in me. So I take pleasure in weaknesses, insults, catastrophes, persecutions, and in pressures, because of Christ. For when I am weak, then I am strong.”
2 Corinthians 12:9-10 HCSB