Not a Victim Blog #5

Well, I messed up!! I’m not proud of myself at all. I became that person I used to judge from the side lines. But it was all me! I lost it! It’s amazing how much power a narcissistic personality has, when the target is not rooted in Gods word and not immersed with the power of prayer.  

I didn’t start the day out with specific prayer for the moment. I didn’t come prepared. I reacted in a moment of weakness. I allowed the narcissist to bring me down to their level. I became the victim allowing the narcissist to claim a victim triumph. After this devastating show of defeat, the narcissist couldn’t get to their phone fast enough to share how mistreated they had been. And rightly so. I gave this personality a truth to share. I’m ashamed and overtook and defeated. And here I am trying to help the readers of this blog, how hypocritical of me. My attitude has forever changed. My relationship completely broken. I’ve given up. Given in. Deflated. I’ve been beaten.   But then God gently lifts my chin, looks me in the eyes, and says…

…“My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is perfected in weakness.” …

‭‭2 Corinthians‬ ‭12:9‬ ‭CSB‬‬

The advice I gave in an earlier blog about writing a narcissist instead of talking, when possible? Well, it backfired on me. It works for a while, but like everything else I’ve tried, sooner or later the narcissist learns how to use it against us. They are ruthless. I am weak. I cave. I react. 

It took me a few days before I could write again. But maybe God showed me this to reveal to me that this blog isn’t about how to change the narcissistic personalities. No we can’t do that. They’re everywhere, turn on the tv, look at social media, walk down the street, you’re sure to meet at least one. No this blog is about us! The ones who struggle against the narcissistic personalities. We can’t hide. We can’t run. We can’t stick our heads in the sand. What can we do? What should we do? Let’s look to Gods word. Let’s learn this together. 

Here are some verses God gave me for this blog…I find it interesting that the same verse shows up in different books of the Bible. Doesn’t that amplify the importance?

Keep praying!! Share your prayer requests here so we can support each other in prayer!

Matthew 5:44 But I tell you, love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you | Christian Standard Bible (CSB) | Download The Bible App Now

Ephesians 3:17 and that Christ may dwell in your hearts through faith. I pray that you, being rooted and firmly established in love | Christian Standard Bible (CSB) | Download The Bible App Now

2 Samuel 10:12 Be strong! Let’s prove ourselves strong for our people and for the cities of our God. May the LORD’s will be done.” | Christian Standard Bible (CSB) | Download The Bible App Now

1 Chronicles 19:13 Be strong! Let’s prove ourselves strong for our people and for the cities of our God. May the LORD’s will be done.” | Christian Standard Bible (CSB) | Download The Bible App Now

10 Comments

  • Ty

    The word of God says in revelation that “We overcome by the blood of the lamb and by the words of our testimony “. Why God allows certain people (family) to cause so much grief in our lives, I’ll never know! But the woman you are and are becoming to help so many by your testimony and transparency is how God is glorified!! Great blog.

  • Takhia Gaither Stuckey

    Thank you for posting the verses! I am dealing with a narcissistic person myself and actually working on a few things to put out, one of them being a devotional. Prayers for you as you continue to maneuver through this and prayers for strength and the peace of God to always surround and sustain you.

    • Debbie Hymer

      Thank you for the encouragement! That’s exciting to hear about your devotional, keep me posted. My prayers are for you as well. God is using us to share His love and comfort to others! My book will more than likely be a fictional story, something any reader can pick up and be encouraged and strengthened.

  • Stacey

    Thank you for sharing this post! Very deep. Thank you so much for those powerful verses. Each verse stirs something within… something wonderful…

  • Shanice

    And then if you’re an intermediate, most likely one
    thing closer to 1% of your body weight per thirty
    days is a decent target. That Is most likely gonna be between the 200 to 300
    calorie surplus. They simply gave them a roughly 2000 calorie weight gainer on high
    of their recurring food plan. So mainly, take
    a glance at your routine and see what workout routines this
    technique could work properly with. Across these 5 studies, 4 found more hypertrophy when using lengthened partials versus full range
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    In this article, I’ll be rating 7 of the most popular exercise splits to find the highest performers
    all the way down to the ones that are losing your time.
    Armed along with your newfound information, you’re set to turn into the next Mr.
    Olympia. All champion bodybuilders had been novices once, identical to you, and set foot in the gym for the first time.

    Old college bodybuilders thrived on excessive volume coaching to construct muscle.
    With our carry movement we’re going to be accruing
    extra quantity. Our goals with this beneficial exercise are to get an extra conditioning effect from
    the carry, and to construct grip sustainability which will benefit us in our main lifts.

    I assume people who’ve by no means lifted weights earlier than, to supply them with a frame of reference for what a partial ought to actually appear to be,
    instructing them a 4 range of movement first is nice.
    Personally in my coaching, I use exclusively lengthened partials.

    Yeah, so I suppose the one finest approach to do it would be as a substitute
    of doing a full range of motion on a given exercise, try utilizing about 50% or about
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    We checked out lower set volumes all the method in which to momentary failure.

    A exercise that incorporates heavy compound exercises with a
    combination of isolation workouts and overall volume (more sets and reps).
    I’ll clarify why beneath, but first let’s check out what a easy bodybuilding exercise look like.
    Strength training builds density and that’s what offers your muscle tissue the hard and toned look — not bodybuilding workout
    routines. If you are glad with the dimensions of
    your muscular tissues, you should then give consideration to doing a muscle definition workout routine.
    Most bodybuilding exercise routines are the identical and
    that’s truly okay.
    You don’t want to deplete your oxygen to a point where you’re on the verge of
    passing out—that’s not going that will assist
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    ready to offer it your all on each working set.

    The fundamental training principles and the nutrition parts of the
    article apply to you as well, in fact, but other than that, you understand your own physique and capabilities far better than I do.

    You have already laid the muse of staying ahead of the pack as far as well
    being, strength, and muscle mass goes. If you’re an skilled lifter with years
    of coaching beneath your belt, you don’t have to alter something.
    Simply listen to your body if it tells you that you would possibly need more recovery to
    perform its finest now that you’re over 50.

    That is a secure dose and a correct safeguard to make sure your body and
    muscle tissue get sufficient.
    Focus on rowing your upper arms straight out to the edges, and squeezing your
    shoulder blades again and collectively within the prime of the motion. Notice that
    the face pull includes a bit of external rotation of your arms on the finish of the motion, in distinction to the
    cable rear delt row, which is extra of a straight pull.
    With the entrance and facet delts taken care of, it’s time to turn our consideration to the rear delts.
    If the exercise still feels uncomfortable, or you are in search of an alternative, you should check out the monkey row.
    The upright row is a barbell exercise that works not only your aspect delts, but additionally your higher
    trapezius. The stability of the bench will let you focus
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    Omega-3s are important polyunsaturated fats with a quantity of well being benefits and possibly even muscle-building properties.
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    rich in protein and other useful vitamins.
    Start the day with the same breakfast you’ve had for the previous couple of days.
    Keep your excessive fluid and sodium consumption, but add one hundred mg of potassium to your breakfast, lunch,
    and pre-sleep meal. The sodium-potassium pump will help
    you store maximum amounts of water inside your muscles, pulling it from under the skin and storing it the place you need it to be.

    The third part is as soon as again a hybrid, for two distinct reasons.
    One is to reacclimatize your physique to the usual bodybuilding
    program you’ll return to on the finish of the 12-week cycle.

    The other is to place your new energy to the service of isolation workouts.

    Deloading is performing the identical exercise but cutting it in half with regard to volume
    and depth. It means you’re just displaying up and going by way of the motions.
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    enter your e-mail tackle within the box below, and hit the “send it now” button. If
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    Your shoulders and arms will get some stimulation from the opposite workouts.

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    Total-body workouts sound like they’d take a long time. But
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    and works superbly for newbies or people who find themselves brief on time.
    On exercises four by way of 6, you’re repeating exercises 1 via three
    so goal for more explosive swings, or extra total units when you struggled to maintain up
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    For the following 4 weeks, you’ll be shifting a lot and resting little.

    Most of the remainder periods, actually, are energetic, which means about 95%
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    The Lean Mass-15 routine is a four-week plan that features a quantity
    of superior training principles designed not simply to build muscle, however
    enhance cardio operate and burn fats as well. That’s as a end result of, with its intense
    pacing and active rest periods, it’s partly a HIIT cardio routine—just one which additionally
    builds muscle. Carbohydrates don’t construct muscle independently, but that doesn’t
    mean that they’re useless for building muscle.
    You store the carbs you eat in your muscle as glycogen, which you then use to gasoline your exercises.

    The analysis means that you’ll promote extra muscle mass lifting three,200 kg than you would say 1,300 kg.
    Over the previous few years, numerous research
    papers have proven that if you would like
    to develop muscle quick you have to concentrate on coaching quantity [2].
    Set a weekly schedule and treat your gym exercises like appointments.
    After the primary few weeks, you’ll find that the health club simply becomes a part of what you
    do.
    On exercises 4-6, you’ll be repeating exercises 1-3,
    so aim for extra total reps per RM set the second time through.
    To perform the exercise, clean the kettlebells to the rack
    place, then perform a set of navy presses. Then, when you’re ready,
    clear the kettlebells back into the rack place
    and perform a set of front squats. Lively recovery days are kinda-sorta rest days, when you can do exercises
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    The program has been thoughtfully composed via years of private experimentation, consulting the analysis, and
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    Our app StrengthLog is one hundred pc free to download and use as
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    You’ll be doing barely higher reps to finish the exercise off.
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    Anyplace from three days to six days per week can be devoted
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    Lastly, I’d say some kind of very deep sumo squatting is also really
    superior for the glutes. If you don’t get this message until you’re 50, there’s nonetheless time to be smart.

    Just follow the strategies above and you’ll get again on the successful observe.
    IT’S MUCH HARDER to construct new muscle
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    If you see a muscular over-50-year-old at the gym, it’s
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    All of the other muscle teams are skilled immediately 2x per week.
    For the superior bodybuilder, you will need to change
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    such as a 5-day workout. This workout is the right approach to hold the body from getting used to a certain exercise and plateauing.
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    2 to four. As A Outcome Of I’m bringing you unique insights from 7 of
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    A correctly carried out Lat Pull-Down is also good if–again–the lifter
    is cautious to drag the again side of the arm towards the physique and not
    behind it. Grasp them and you’ll be capable of use them for a lifetime.
    In common although, a relaxation day ought
    to be for rest and letting your muscle tissue recover from the hard work you’ve
    put in. As an different to the remaining day allotted for Day 7
    of the 6-day break up, you’ll have the ability to optionally
    substitute an active restoration day for that day.
    There is not any magic number for length of time to rest though too much rest between sets isn’t nice and too little is worse.
    Rest durations between sets aren’t written into this system and we don’t suggest a
    relaxation period of a particular length.
    Bodybuilders are particularly arm-focused, and I’ve but to satisfy a
    lifter who didn’t need to know the secret to constructing stronger, more sculpted arms.
    Pull-ups are top-of-the-line exercises for constructing
    higher physique strength. That mentioned, protein powder and creatine
    are both supplements that may assist facilitate muscle progress,
    per Valdes.
    There’s plenty of issues to discuss in this
    article, so sit again, seize a protein bar (after all it’s bulking season), and skim all
    about tips on how to accurately bulk. End every workout with one other couple of minutes of sunshine cardio and some stretching to minimize post-exercise muscle
    soreness. You’ll see there are some slight changes after week 4
    to maintain up your progress and avoid stagnation.
    With that stated, not all carbs are created equal and it’s easy to overeat carbs as they are in pretty
    much every thing. A meals calculator will let you perceive how a lot carbs you may be eating as it’s going
    to tell you how much are in each kind of food you set on your plate.

    Although there is not a “bad” protein like there is with carbs and fat, not
    all sources of protein are good.
    Now you’ll need a plan, which is the place strength coach
    and bodybuilding prep coach Eric Broser (@coachericbroser) comes into the
    equation. He’s created this bulking program that makes use
    of heavy weight, low reps, excessive reps, and a ton of tension via tempo management
    to really stress your muscle fibers. Feel free to alter
    up the accent actions every eight weeks for similar exercises, as lengthy as you keep the course.

    When we inform you to do “9 repetitions,” we understand
    you may get 9 reps in your first set, 8 in your second, and 6 in your
    third. Subsequent workout, attempt to get 10 reps in your first set, or 9
    reps in your second set, or improve the load a bit.
    You won’t be in a position to progress on every exercise every exercise, but attempt your greatest.

    This workout plan takes you out of your current starting
    point to lean and imply in 12 weeks. Armed with the information that three’s nobody true optimum rep range for hypertrophy, we’d like to try the keys
    to most lean mass growth. What you’ll notice is that mechanical tension may be very much about load-volume.
    This merely signifies that if you carry a heavy
    weight you create such a stimulus that muscle fibers turn into
    broken. After all, this could be a pretty superior muscle
    constructing plan, so with out the inspiration power that
    you’re bringing to the table it’ll pretty much swallow
    you up complete.
    Inside these, he aimed to include 200g of protein, 200g of carbohydrates and 50g of fat.
    Combined with his efforts in the health club and weekly boxing training, this
    diet resulted in a day by day calorie deficit of roughly 750
    calories. The exercises beneath are those Graham used during the
    “lean bulk” section of his training, with the objective of building as a lot
    muscle as attainable. Before you get started,
    there are a few key phrases Thurston says you need to familiarise your self with.
    Alan Ritchson discovered the 5 body weight calisthenic routines helpful for coaching and says
    he’s been doing them for over 20 years.
    In distinction, a split routine will be a extra sensible choice if you would like to prepare most days of the week.
    The 6-day break up can be effective, particularly for intermediate and superior lifters.

    However, intermediate and advanced lifters have
    largely completed enjoying their fast “newbie positive aspects,” so although
    this can be a nice plan, it most likely won’t produce speedy results.
    Missed workouts will unbalance your coaching week, especially if it
    is a frequent prevalence.
    We advocate keeping saturated fat to 10-20% of your complete fat intake.
    In as little as 4-weeks you’ll be leaner, stronger and a hell of a lot
    more jacked. This is your opportunity to take life at full pressure and produce one thing you’d never think about possible.
    Any sort of cardio that raises your coronary heart rate may be carried out
    to extend your endurance. Jogging, boxing, biking, swimming, and
    the stairstepper are some examples. Simply remember to
    extend your calorie intake in your cardio day to compensate for the
    calories being burnt. A good rule of thumb to ask yourself
    is, “Would I be comfy in public without a shirt?” If the answer is no, ask yourself why.

    Changing the grip, angle of pull or elbow place can change how the motion targets the muscle.
    With no specific warmup, Chris Bumstead jumps right into the first
    exercise of the day, a lat pulldown using an underhand shut grip.

    During squats, he wears a belt and a pair of knee sleeves.

    Interestingly, he performs the complete exercise without any footwear on. I’ve all the time accomplished sumo, Romanian, or conventional deadlifts right here.

    This second exercise starts with massive bulking
    exercises, then shifts into easier workouts for your
    core and posture. The workout sheets allow you to swap these exercises for muscle-building workout routines, but if you’re nonetheless comparatively new to lifting,
    I’d keep the workouts as is. When Marco was coaching college,
    skilled, and Olympic athletes, he had most of them on considered one of these Upper/Lower splits.
    Having two lower-body days per week helps athletes run faster and jump greater.

    It helps powerlifters get strong at squats and deadlifts.
    And it gives bodybuilders the covetted X-Frame physique, with broad shoulders and thick thighs.
    Full-body workouts additionally let you reap the benefits of supersets, the place you alternate between coaching different muscle groups.

    Day three is the first Chris Bumstead back workout of the week.
    In addition, the biceps are getting worked within the majority of those actions as
    they work to drag alongside the again. After that, knock out three
    units of fifteen on the pec deck, then mix in some triceps work with two sets of EZ bar cranium
    crushers, before finishing up with two units of push-ups to failure.

    By the end of the pushups, your chest and tris must be smoked.
    If you’re following his plan however need some push-up variations to play
    around with, there are many options.
    You’ll also discover a bunch of coaching applications and workouts in our workout log app.
    Many are free, but our more advanced programs and workouts (such as this one) are for
    premium users only. It’s virtually impossible to maintain track of
    your progress and not using a exercise log. Our app StrengthLog
    is one hundred pc free to obtain and use as a workout tracker and general power coaching app.

    Beginners should concentrate on a structured program with compound lifts like squats, deadlifts, and bench presses.
    Start with manageable weights, prioritize kind, and
    progressively enhance resistance. A year-long approach allows regular progress while
    minimizing the danger of harm or burnout. Embrace endurance and suppleness exams to spherical out your evaluation. For example,
    test your most number of push-ups or pull-ups and measure your vary of movement in key joints.

    This complete strategy ensures your year-long bulking part
    delivers balanced enhancements in power, muscle development, and total health.
    Implement them to make sure your onerous work pays off throughout your bulking journey.

    A clear bulk requires far more dedication and dedication.
    However the excellent news is, it comes with way less fats
    acquire, and for some genetically fortunate folks, fairly presumably none in any respect.

    As a real newbie, you actually don’t need to worry about bulking or
    chopping. All you want to do is eat good and train onerous and you will see
    amazing outcomes.
    (1) He also makes use of cardio to boost his efficiency on set
    but feels he has to do more. You ought to eat healthily and increase calorie consumption before and after a exercise in order to bulk.
    If you’re struggling to hit your vitamin targets from actual
    food, you might beeline for the supplements aisle.
    However, Valdes urges exercisers to proceed with warning.

    “We need to prioritize a food-first strategy, as dietary supplements aren’t a substitute for consuming whole meals,” she says.
    For instance, he notes that a marker of success might be the weight you’re in a position to raise throughout your bulking interval, your
    velocity or sport performance, or your physique composition. Sticking to a minimal of one,
    or multiple, measurements might help you observe success.

    We’ll educate you how to achieve 20 pounds within the
    subsequent 20 weeks. This article aims ought to offer you every little thing you
    need to start training for muscle progress. I’ll also happily answer your questions within the feedback beneath.

    This is my favourite sequence of exercises for packing muscle onto beginners.
    The first 4 workouts are big, and they’ll stimulate muscle development all
    via your body. And then you definitely get the three
    most dependable arm workout routines.
    Really Feel free to modify up the times to cater to your schedule.
    Get Enough Recovery – This routine is a 3 day routine because you need to get well
    between days to actually see any progress. You can beat down your physique every single day
    within the fitness center but if you do not recuperate correctly, you are simply spinning your wheels.
    As Soon As you’re finished lifting, leap onto a machine and
    carry out a high-intensity interval exercise. Verify out the link if you don’t
    know what a HIIT exercise is, however beneath is a simple 15-minute routine that
    might work well.
    Looking to build some muscle and don’t know where to start?
    Or maybe you’ve hit a plateau and questioning the method
    to get out of it. Our intense 12 Week Muscle Constructing Program will put you on the best path for building and shaping
    your muscles.
    He’s smart with his coaching and balances out his cheat meals
    with training, too. Ritchson additionally appears muscular in his current movie, The Ministry of Ungentlemanly Warfare, and says he plans to play his Reacher role for a really long time.
    He’s tailoring his training to maintain the muscles acknowledged with the
    character. Alan Ritchson says he’s not aiming to hit new PRs and retains his time within the gym to 30 minutes.
    However, for those 30 minutes, he offers his all to training, using training to failure, supersets, or even tri-sets.

    You can at all times add extra weight subsequent week if this
    week is simply too straightforward. Progressive overload includes exerting slightly more effort than last time (lift a heavier weight or do 1 more rep) constantly.

    Check out our Beginner’s Guide to the Health Club
    for everything you need to know and getting began in a gym with pattern exercises.
    Yes, he normally does cardio within the morning
    to boost his endurance and cardiovascular fitness.
    If you’ll have the ability to manage it, I additionally suggest doing it for 20 minutes
    of steady cardio at least three times weekly. Clusters are an effective way to extend
    quantity with higher hundreds.
    Camila Mendes has at all times been into an informal exercise, but now, she’s
    in coaching all week. As onerous as you could be
    working to grow your booty, you might simply be focusing on the incorrect areas and
    glute exercises. Why your upper glutes deserve more love, and one of the best workouts to strengthen them.
    Beans and lentils include black beans, kidney beans, pinto beans, chickpeas, edamame,
    and green, brown, red, and yellow lentils (a fast-cooking, high-protein, and carbohydrate
    source). Dried beans require longer cooking time,
    however canned beans (choose the no-added-salt versions) are able to eat.
    Most people think of push-ups as a chest train – which they’re.

    References:

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